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Surfacing Grief

For some reason, the loss of our pregnancy has really hit me tonight. Maybe it’s seeing Rowan experience firsts I will never get to witness that baby attempt, or seeing so many others post about their budding pregnancies or the newborn so and so is about to take home. Or maybe it’s that originally my doctors had thought this was a blighted ovum, and then last week the more in depth results came back and they showed it was in fact more complicated than that. I don’t know. It could be as simple as “it’s been 3 weeks and I’m suddenly really feeling it in my soul”

Grief is a weird thing. You’re fine one minute, and the next you’re broken. I know we will try again, and I know it’ll happen for us in time, but right now the loss stings and right now it is a very real emptiness.

Continuing hope, everlasting patience, and sheer determination will not only get us through this, but make the next blessing even more joyous. I know so.

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