A common, and societal misconception tends to be that discussing grief and trauma = victimizing yourself.
It can get so overwhelming to take stock of my traumas, to feel the weight of those experiences, and to carry them alone. And so, I talk about it. It allows me to give myself a reprieve from the heaviness, and helps keep me from isolating. Putting words to the thoughts and feelings I have as a result of my traumas, is standing in my strength and taking control of the one thing that I can- how I deal with it. Choosing not to suppress my grief is healthy for me.
I’m not asking anyone to feel sorry for us. In fact, I’m usually not asking for anything at all. I’m simply expressing myself in the manner that best supports me as an individual. Someone finding discomfort within my self expression is their own problem, and how they react to that discomfort is entirely their responsibility, not mine. I carry the weight of my grief every moment of every day. I do not have to carry the weight of anyone else’s inability to understand it.